Remember me? The guy that ran you off at least 3 troll boards? How many times did you issue goodbye cruel Valhalla threads on account of me giving your face a wedgie with your upper lip which actually made it look better than what was left over after that swarm of angry termites who turned your face into a water cooler cup?
I think we've reached that time again, a little trip back to the old school just for old times sake. You know, because you want to take little sniper shots from here and there like the passive aggressive purse clenching cat lady many have come to know you are?
First off, let's talk about your most recent melty. You know, the one over at Murdy's second board where you tried to stick your chemically enhanced, bionic face tent into a situation that had nothing to do with you and got tossed like an old magazine nobody wants anymore? Funny how you thought you'd huff and puff and blow my house down but ended up getting a battalion of insects stuck to your brain as soon as you
inhaled for obvious reasons. Cute. Self owning and ineffective. But cute none the less.
Or how about we talk about your close encounters of the butt-hurt kind over at Murdy's first board. You know, where you ran away with your silicon sniffer tucked between your legs because I told you to put the banana peel back over your head and go sit in the corner because your idea of FBI grade background checks for new registrants made you look like a fucking sissy? That type of shit reeks of sore asshole and only favored among histrionic granola nut grannies such as yourself who are too emotionally tethered to this game to play it properly?
Testosterone patch or yohimbie bark gummy bears? Maybe? I think it's time. You know, before the proverbial fat lady sings and you get stuffed into a sleeping bag and pushed over the side of an overpass by embarrassed family members?
Listen, you've never been a main event at any of these boards and you never will. You're kinda just
there and people mostly tolerate you because, well, it's not every day we get to hang out with someone who can snort a basketball whole and still have room for lunch. But make no mistake about it, I'll walk you and your entire gang of guppies around the block with ease whenever the whim strikes me.
If you wanna leave a mark on life instead of being remembered as the little old lady who couldn't you should be selling your picture without the discolored blow-horn attached to desperate parents who want to scare their kids to sleep instead of trying so hard to “troall” and then failing miserably at it.
I mean if u want some tips on how to be interesting just ask. Because then I'd just tell you to stick a bounty roll in your face and vacuum up some good Colombian Coke and hop around from forum to forum looking and acting just like Q*bert instead of slithering around in the shadows like a complete butthurt spastic forum leper.
So which one of you puddle peons at Clumsy & Trippen want to be next?
Call out? Your whole board against me?