I can attempt to imagine. But as hard as I might, it's like attempting to cover a king size mattress with a twin size bed sheet.
Needless to say I am truly sorry for your loss.
The thing is as sypathizers when we hear of someones death, it hurts, but we can turn it off and go about our business... but that sort of close deathpain when it hapens to you personally, doesn't turn off for a long, long time. You only really get the meaning of
true love when you lose your most precious possessions, your children. There is a moral though and an important one. Do not miss one second of life away from your kids... If they want to play a game, go play it with them... If they want your time at anything (doing anything), drop what you're doing and give it to them. That is the sought of thing that matters most in the end.
true love has nothing to do with romance.
everthing other than true love is vanity...