Not necessarily. It also might have to do with the fact that male flamers outnumber female flamers by far.
I suppose you can provide a list of aggressive female flamers who are also known to push boundaries that many agree are ‘too far’.
Cassandra's Curse, St. Kitty, Lady Ice, Nikita, Feral, feral, Calliope, Cardtrick (don't pretend otherwise), Attention Whore, Caskur, Bunnybunbun, Ladybug, Heart Shaped Bottom, cw, Menti, Huffy Pink Canuck, Flea, etc....etc... just to name a few...
Zip your white knight back up... it's wilting...